Will Lisa Bonet’s real husband please stand up?

Something freaky is going on in the House of Jason Momoa.  Jason Momoa, aka Conan the Beautiful Barbarian, has supposedly been happily cooped up with Lisa Bonet for the past 8 years.  However, you wouldn’t always know it, given the company she keeps . . . keeping.

The lovely Lisa Bonet has been known to mesmerize us with her bedroom eyes and get naked and dance in chicken blood under the bright light of the moon for movies.  Nowadays, whenever there’s something hip and hopping to do, the fairy-like actress shows up twinkling for the cameras not with hunky hubby, Jason Momoa, but just as hunky, ex-hubby, Lenny Kravitz, Rocker and baby daddy to her eldest baby.

Will Lisa Bonet’s real husband please stand up?

It’s not folklore that Lisa Bonet lives a barefoot vegan, braids down the back, flower child with an open door as long as you have an open bag of weed sort of lifestyle.  So, yeah, she digs the past.  And for the sake of familial continuity for Zoe Kravitz (for she was yet a toddler Kravitz when her parents divorced), we were willing to look away from the continued canoodling.

Does Jason Momoa wake up every morning with a snake on HIS arm? Or just Mondays, Twos-days, and Sundays?

But a certain hen-pecked member of this extended family over the years seems to have overshot some boundaries.  If it wore underwear, it would probably own an undie drawer in the House of Momoa.  But it doesn’t—which can only be good news for Lisa.

Will Lisa Bonet’s real husband please stand up?

In some especially fetching paparazzi-generated family photos, it’s Kravitz’s arm warming Bonet’s neck like a scarf.  Not Momoa’s.  Jason’s appearance is like that of a spectre or, more aptly put, the photo-bomber. Most of the time when Lisa Bonet and Lenny Kravitz are photographed, Jason Momoa is simply ghost.  Now read the fine print: Baby Kravitz—the seed between these two—is nowhere to be found either!!

In photos, Lisa Bonet and Lenny Kravitz’s smiles have comedy in them.  The expressions, Mona Lisa-like.  The gorgeous dark eyes, sprinkled with a little Lucille Ball, seem to say:  “We obviously have this ‘OPEN’ secret.  Since our daughter has been able to feed and bathe herself for over 20 years now, we were just wondering if this would be the day somebody would finally OUT our lifestyle.”

Now, now, don’t pull your hair out for Jason Momoa.  Gone pat them hairs back down.  Jason Momoa (you’d know, if you’re not legally blind) is like a giant bag of delicious chick feed to a yard full of starving birds. The world is his hen house.  He’s even been caught on the receiving end of a few lusty pecks.  From both exes and co-stars.

Wonder if the flower child wilted when Rose planted her two lips on the Barbarian?

So the moral of this folk story is that Lisa Bonet who has a fondness for back-in-the-day thangz can forgive a whole lotta back-in-the-day wrongz and certain back-in-the-day menz.  But an old dude playing America’s Daddy, rich off Coke and pokin’ his beak in the good egg’s biz-nest to protect her innocent A1 image?!?  Well, irony of ironies, Bill Cosby ain’t one of ‘em.

American pop culture and hypocrisy at its best!